Dating is not always a simple game, especially if you haven’t dated in years or even decades. When you want to know why your dating plan isn’t working out and what you should consider, there are a few factors to keep in mind. Having a clear focus and a mindset prepared for the dating world is a way to get out there, meet new potential partners all while enjoying the time you spend in the mix.
You’re Not Putting Yourself Out There
If you are stuck in a rut when it comes to dating it just may be that you are not putting yourself out there enough. Rather than hoping to meet “the one” at a local bar, try various outlets that involve hobbies and casual meetups in groups. Looking to online dating is also an alternative that gives you more opportunity to begin dating “outside of your circle” of friends and acquaintances. Create a profile that highlights yourself, your hobbies, interests and passions to help find others who are able to relate and also interested in you romantically.
You’re Overselling Yourself
When you do choose to head out to bars or promote an online dating profile it is imperative to ensure you are not overselling yourself or “trying too hard”. When you are presumed as an individual who is bragging, egocentric or narcissistic it can be overwhelmingly challenging to form a solid and long-lasting relationship, platonic or romantic. Be sure to share your hobbies, interests and passions in a humble and friendly manner, rather than attempting to appear smarter and more accomplished than others. Bragging and showing off too much is a way to quickly lose chances of carrying on real conversation with another, regardless of the method you prefer to indulge in when you begin to date.
You Move Too Fast
Moving too fast when you first begin dating is also a big “no”. Avoid rushing into a relationship unless you are entirely sure it is reciprocated from the person you are also interested in. Moving too fast while dating is a surefire way to get partners to turn the other cheek, especially if they are looking for something more meaningful or naturally prefer to date at a slower pace. Getting a feel for your partner’s emotions is possible by asking personal questions, checking in on their day and generally getting a feel for how comfortable they are with you with the amount of communication you have between each other.
Too Forward is Not Always the Answer
Complimenting a date is one way to make an impression, but it is extremely important to avoid taking it too far and being “too forward”. When you are overly complimentary or if you prefer using a myriad of sexual innuendos, this can turn a potential partner away extremely quick. Always be sure to “test the waters” when dating to ensure you have similar senses in humor and appreciate sarcasm or wit when looking to use puns, sexual innuendo or other references that are likely to seem too forward to someone who is more traditional when dating. Even if you are extremely interested in your date it is essential to have reservations in gushing about your feelings and emotions, especially when first getting involved in dating again.
Taking the time to reevaluate your own wants and needs for a relationship is essential to find a match that is ideal for you. When you want to get back into dating, setting boundaries and making relationship statuses clear before getting involved is a way to save on the worry, stress and time you spend looking for the right one.
