After almost 20 years of marriage, I’ll be the first to tell you—reconnecting is not always easy. Between two careers, kids with social lives that rival our own, nonstop extracurriculars, meal prepping and keeping the household organized, some days it feels like my husband and I are co-managing a family business more than we are a couple.
But here’s the thing: if you don’t make time for each other, that connection can quietly drift. And summer—when the days are longer and routines just a little looser—is the perfect season to bring a little romance back into the mix.
I’m not talking about lavish date nights or dramatic gestures. I’m talking about small, intentional moments after the kids have said goodnight and the house is finally quiet. Here are a few of our favourites:
- Movie & Charcuterie Night: Once the boys have gone to their rooms, we’ll pour some wine, pull out the charcuterie board (fill it with whatever’s in the fridge—cheese, chocolate, fruits, crackers, done), and cozy up to binge-watch our fave TV series. No scrolling (it’s a challenge, but we try!), no work talk (also not easy to do lol)—just us.
- Patio Talks: In the summer, when the nights are warm, we’ll sit outside on the patio—sometimes quietly, other times lost in deep conversation—with soft music playing in the background. Lately, it’s been mostly country tunes drifting through the air. One evening, I asked, “If we could take a kid-free trip tomorrow, where would we go?” That was last summer, and not long after, we found ourselves in Punta Cana. It was amazing.
- Mini Kitchen Dance Parties: I swear, nothing resets the mood like a late-night BBQ, some apps, some wine and dancing barefoot in the kitchen to a throwback playlist.
Ask Better Questions
When life is full, conversations can default to logistics. Try slipping in one of these next time you’re both winding down:
- “What’s something I did this week that made you feel appreciated?”
- “What do you miss about our early days—and how do we bring some of that back?”
- “What would we do if we had 24 hours with zero responsibilities?”
You’re Still a Team—Don’t Forget
It’s so easy to get lost in the roles we play—parents, partners, professionals. But underneath it all, it’s still you and your partner. The one who made you laugh till you cried. The one who shared takeout on the floor of your first house or apartment.
So find a way—your way—to reconnect. This summer, let the slow nights and warm air be your cue to lean in, not check out.
Because even when you’re both running on empty, love doesn’t need a lot—just a little room to breathe.
