Some take place in public restrooms. Others involve you and your best friend in a sweet and lust-filled embrace. The most salacious ones have you tasting forbidden fruit, and enjoying every bite of it without guilt. Whatever the setting, or the object of your desire, all the above scenarios have one thing in common. They form the basis of your sexual fantasies. But is it normal to imagine such things? Of course! And according to psychologists, it’s also healthy! We break down the meaning of six common sexual fantasies to show you that sometimes, things aren’t always as they appear.
1. Sex with someone other than your partner
You’re in a loving, committed relationship, but every so often, you daydream about rolling under the sheets with Ryan Gosling, the cute barista from the corner coffee house, or even the square from the accounts department. What does it all mean? To fantasize about having sex with someone else isn’t necessarily an indication you’re unhappy with your relationship. Sometimes, it simply means that new experiences turn you on. Also, while you don’t necessarily fancy your co-worker, you may be sexually attracted to him in your dream simply because it’s possible that you, for example, secretly admire his confidence, or show of leadership and wish you embodied the same qualities.
2. Sex with an ex
You’ve turned the page on that relationship long ago, yet the ex-boyfriend you swore you would never let back into your life manages to creep into your dreams. The appearance of an ex-flame in your sexual fantasies usually coincides with the moment your current relationship is in a rut. Fantasizing about the ex signifies the need to break from routine and infuse much-needed passion back into your love life.
3. Sex with a stranger
You dream about sharing a night of passion with a tall, dark and mysterious man. A very common sexual fantasy, sex with a stranger has more to do with you than you may think. In fact, experts argue that the stranger is really a mirror of yourself. The excitement and thrill of a secret love affair is simply your psyche’s way of telling you that you’re proud of your recent accomplishments while the stranger embodies qualities you admire in yourself.
4. Sex with another woman
Fantasizing about sex with another woman does not mean you should question your sexual orientation This type of sexual fantasy is actually quite normal. Most women who dream about making love to another woman haven’t the slightest interest in acting it out. Rather, the fantasy simply means that you find the female body beautiful. And deep down, it shows that you are open-minded about sex.
5. Sex with forbidden fruit
When the object of your desire is your best friend’s husband or your boyfriend’s best friend, does it mean you secretly want to cheat on your sweetie? Not at all! The person you fantasize about may simply be a romantic, caring, or attentive person, and you fantasize about them only because you feel your significant other lacks these qualities. When you’re having this dream, it may be time to talk to your partner about your desire for him to be more attentive to your needs.
6. Sex in public spaces
One of the most common sex fantasies, daydreaming about doing the deed in a public setting, illustrates our thrill-seeking side. This fantasy in itself is exciting since it carries the risk of getting caught. What’s more, the idea of others admiring your sexual prowess and body is what makes this fantasy most alluring. But in real life, getting caught in the act would be anything but sexy, and more likely embarrassing, which is why it’s safest to keep this fantasy in the dream world.